Ok. Today was the first day of the new quarter. It was Wednesday classes. I'm team teaching Meta and Journalism with Jeremy. It didn't go badly. In meta we played an intro game where they had to take some amount of toilet paper. However much they wanted. We said nothing. Then, for however many squares they had, they had to come up with something nice about themselves. Next, we paired them up by counting out numbers and finding their matching numbers. They introduced themselves to each other and said the nice things about themselves to the person. After 5 minutes we had them get up and introduce each other and tell one thing about the other person. It was pretty cool working with Jeremy. Like Voltron, together we have better pedagogy. More directed thought and creativity is given to it. Anyways, next I read out the "What is Meta" sheet and gave out the homework.
Journalism actually went really well. I'm kind of excited about this class. The kids seemed to be into the journalism. Our first publish date is January 18, 2006. They decided on the name Teen Xpress. A zine written by teens for teens. Jeremy envision ourselves as consultants and facilitators while they will be producing the product. We have one student that is going to be our student editor. She will be doing the first round of correcting papers and enforcing deadlines. So sweet. We will be doing the final round.
I'm also having my CTM do community service. They want to feed the homeless in Oakland. We are doing a canned food drive and bake sales to donate to charity. 2 of my CTM that have the most hours took the lead on this one. I'm giving them hours off but they wanted to take the lead on this before I even mentioned hours off. Pretty cool.
I realized today that they are still kids and they want to have fun. And fuck I want to have fun too. I have this idea for a battle CTM. Kind of like the Iron Chef style thing. Our school is ridiculously dirty. We could have a CTM battle 4th period or Wednesday. Whoever's CTM can gather the most trash within a time frame gets a prize. I was thinking about VIP privileges. So VIP privileges would mean they could cut to the front of the line at lunch or something. Something. But I'll throw it out there and see anyone bites.
Wednesday, November 30, 2005
Tuesday, November 29, 2005
School got fucking broke into again. 3rd time now since I've been there. I came in on Sunday to set up some computers and the front gate was wide open and unlocked. Then when we went to school today, my coworker, Betsy found out that her computer had been stolen. There must be a special place in Dante's hell for people like this. Or their karma is going to have them come back as a dung beetle or something. Whatever the case may be, this is totally fucked up and unacceptable to me. I feel like we're going to have to boobytrap the place or something.
I'm fucking stressing the fuck out. I'm coming to the end of the semester at my teaching credential classes and I haven't turned in a bunch of work. I feel like one of my students. Scratch that. Most of them aren't working a full time job that is as taxing as teaching. When they are, I'll cut them a whole lot more breaks. Shit cut them a ton of breaks now. But I'm also nervous cause I'm going to be teaching a multicultural literature class that I have no familiarity with. Then for my Wednesday classes I'm going to be teaching Metamorphosis again and a journalism class. The meta class has to be better than the meta class last year. I'm fucking praying that it is, but then again it could only get better. The journalism... I didn't really want to teach it but I had to come up with a second class after I thought film appreciation was on lock. Then I found out that I had to teach meta and so no film appreciation. I got stuck with journalism with my buddy jeremy cause we got a local paper that is willing to print some student articles so then I'm doing that. So now I'm teaching 3 classes that I don't really want to teach and 2 world cultures classes that I don't have the materials that I need to properly teach them. Teeefuckingrific!!! This is fucking ridiculous.
I'm starting to feel real down and overwhelmed. This is a fucking hard job. All that talk about cushy hours and long vacation time is a big load of shit. I'm at school after the time I get paid. I come home and try to come up with shit to do. On weekends I gotta grade and do more lesson planning and work on my credential. When school is going I gotta be on it. You can't just zone out when there is a roomful of kids staring at you. On top of that, the pay is shitty. I read somewhere that most people quit teaching after the 1st year. I'm really starting to understand why. These robberies have gotten me down too, cause nothing is going to happen. We get robbed and so it goes. The cops ain't doing shit and now the cops will charge you money if they come and check on an alarm. The Fucking cops charge. Protect and serve my ass. They get funded better and paid more. Fucking come and check if my school is getting robbed cause if I can do my job then you'll have less work. It's 2:00AM in the fucking morning. I can't sleep. I've been up doing the last of the grading. I'm tired, pissed, angry, frustrated, and overwhelmed.
I don't like getting robbed. This isn't fair. This isn't just. This isn't right. I work in a public school but I've been to other public schools and there isn't equity. The high school that I went to is vastly different from the one that I'm teaching at now. In almost every fucking way. Granted I'm teaching at an innercity urban high school. But the structural and institutional racism and classism in the American public school system infuriates me. Then to meet and talk to people that think that things are fair and just and that everyone needs to just pick themselves up is just galling. I chat online sometimes and the racist idiots that I meet are just astounding. And these are people with the money to have computers.
But I guess I'm whining. This is reality. This is what I signed up for and my ideals and values of social justice aren't shit unless I'm willing to be in the struggle. I want to be at the school I'm teaching at, but it's just fucking hard. The environment can really pull you down. I suppose I can use this to help me sympathize with my students' plight.
I'm fucking stressing the fuck out. I'm coming to the end of the semester at my teaching credential classes and I haven't turned in a bunch of work. I feel like one of my students. Scratch that. Most of them aren't working a full time job that is as taxing as teaching. When they are, I'll cut them a whole lot more breaks. Shit cut them a ton of breaks now. But I'm also nervous cause I'm going to be teaching a multicultural literature class that I have no familiarity with. Then for my Wednesday classes I'm going to be teaching Metamorphosis again and a journalism class. The meta class has to be better than the meta class last year. I'm fucking praying that it is, but then again it could only get better. The journalism... I didn't really want to teach it but I had to come up with a second class after I thought film appreciation was on lock. Then I found out that I had to teach meta and so no film appreciation. I got stuck with journalism with my buddy jeremy cause we got a local paper that is willing to print some student articles so then I'm doing that. So now I'm teaching 3 classes that I don't really want to teach and 2 world cultures classes that I don't have the materials that I need to properly teach them. Teeefuckingrific!!! This is fucking ridiculous.
I'm starting to feel real down and overwhelmed. This is a fucking hard job. All that talk about cushy hours and long vacation time is a big load of shit. I'm at school after the time I get paid. I come home and try to come up with shit to do. On weekends I gotta grade and do more lesson planning and work on my credential. When school is going I gotta be on it. You can't just zone out when there is a roomful of kids staring at you. On top of that, the pay is shitty. I read somewhere that most people quit teaching after the 1st year. I'm really starting to understand why. These robberies have gotten me down too, cause nothing is going to happen. We get robbed and so it goes. The cops ain't doing shit and now the cops will charge you money if they come and check on an alarm. The Fucking cops charge. Protect and serve my ass. They get funded better and paid more. Fucking come and check if my school is getting robbed cause if I can do my job then you'll have less work. It's 2:00AM in the fucking morning. I can't sleep. I've been up doing the last of the grading. I'm tired, pissed, angry, frustrated, and overwhelmed.
I don't like getting robbed. This isn't fair. This isn't just. This isn't right. I work in a public school but I've been to other public schools and there isn't equity. The high school that I went to is vastly different from the one that I'm teaching at now. In almost every fucking way. Granted I'm teaching at an innercity urban high school. But the structural and institutional racism and classism in the American public school system infuriates me. Then to meet and talk to people that think that things are fair and just and that everyone needs to just pick themselves up is just galling. I chat online sometimes and the racist idiots that I meet are just astounding. And these are people with the money to have computers.
But I guess I'm whining. This is reality. This is what I signed up for and my ideals and values of social justice aren't shit unless I'm willing to be in the struggle. I want to be at the school I'm teaching at, but it's just fucking hard. The environment can really pull you down. I suppose I can use this to help me sympathize with my students' plight.
Friday, November 25, 2005
On Wednesday, Allison and I went on a Peace walk. It was a 5 mile walk with Native Americans and Buddhist monks and we did a tour of shellmounds. At each desecrated shellmound (which is about everyone of them) we would stop, make a circle, and talk about the shellmound and do a little moment of silence or prayer for the area. One Euro archaeologist of the early 1900 estimated that there were over 400 shellmounds in the Bay Area. Natives say there were far more than that. Whatever the case may be, it's some sad fucked up shit. To have your culture and history systematically erased from existence. The Ohlone are not federally recognized by the US gov't. So if they don't exist, then nothing bad is happening to them. Their gravesites are not recognized as gravesites. Could you imagine the US gov't digging up a cemetery, sticking the bones into garbage bags and telling the relatives to come and pick them up? Would never happen.
BTW, those Buddhist monks could fucking walk their asses off. They kept a pretty mean pace and I was on the short walk. They walked beating this prayer drum and one guy had a flag. The shellmound walks were about 17 miles a day and I was on the 4 mile day. Fuck man 17 miles is far. Shit 4 miles was far. Cause then we were 4 miles from where we started and we had to get back. So we walked back. But walking in a group makes walking a whole lot easier.
It was a good thing for me to do because I was aware of the purpose and it's something that forces me to reflect upon it. Walking as a meditation. Conscious zen walking. Walking with Ohlone to be witnesses to their lives and history. Walking for peace to try and change the zeitgeist. Now that I reflect it sounds much better. When I was doing it, my focus was oftentimes more on my own personal discomfort. My feet hurt and I was tired. I'm such a whiner.
BTW, those Buddhist monks could fucking walk their asses off. They kept a pretty mean pace and I was on the short walk. They walked beating this prayer drum and one guy had a flag. The shellmound walks were about 17 miles a day and I was on the 4 mile day. Fuck man 17 miles is far. Shit 4 miles was far. Cause then we were 4 miles from where we started and we had to get back. So we walked back. But walking in a group makes walking a whole lot easier.
It was a good thing for me to do because I was aware of the purpose and it's something that forces me to reflect upon it. Walking as a meditation. Conscious zen walking. Walking with Ohlone to be witnesses to their lives and history. Walking for peace to try and change the zeitgeist. Now that I reflect it sounds much better. When I was doing it, my focus was oftentimes more on my own personal discomfort. My feet hurt and I was tired. I'm such a whiner.
Wednesday, November 23, 2005
On Monday, Jeremy and I went into school and worked on the computer lab. The computer lab situation in our school is... non-existent. So we went in there and sawed off parts of the table to clear up space in the back. Just creating more space made things 100% better. In the past there was cardboard on the back window. We removed that to give the place more life. There is a counselor that works outta that room and she said that she's going to get a couch and curtains and now she's got space to do all that. Jeremy wanted to go in and do all this work but I focused him into working on just the one thing. It was a good thing too cause after we were all done and cleaned up, it was time for us to go.
After that, I went to do teacher observations. It was here that I realized how fucked up my school situation is. There is this stuff called "History alive" by the teachers' curriculum institute. It's all the stuff to help me teach the standards. Help me teach history. Overheads, games, writeups, etc. My friend John had mentioned it, but I didn't really get it until I went to do the observations. This history alive shit provides me with everything that I need to teach history. Fancy fucking that. Now I'm not saying that I'll just take this shit and not ever teach again. But I won't have to be reinventing the wheel constantly. I can have a structure and work around it. Right now, some of my biggest problems are the kids aren't reading the text or turning in homework. How the fuck am I supposed to get information across to the students? When I lecture I get feedback from the kids that they don't want so much lecture. Ok I hear that. But how am I going to get information across to them. I can have interactive games etc etc whatever. But I need to have information to go along with it. It's fucking driving me crazy. I'm trying to come up with shit to teach for 3 different classes. 2 of the classes this last quarter I never taught before. I was having trouble knowing all the info for students. I know my history but I don't know everything. I know. It's true. I said it. I don't know everything.
I would love to radically change my history class and teach history from the present backwards. I wonder if they would allow me to do that. I have to hit these things called standards... but come on. As interesting as the Phoenicians are, I could go my whole life and never know about them and nothing would radically change. It would be so much easier to hook kids into history if I could hook them into something contemporary to their lives. Hey want to know why the US is in Iraq? Want to know why India and Pakistan could drop nukes on each other over Jammu and Kashmir? Want to know why Hugo Chavez is calling Bush an asshole? Then I could break up the world into continents and focus on that. Teach world history that way. Fuck it I'm going to try it. I'm gonna call up Jeff and get his ok on it and try it that ways. I've always wanted to do it that way. We can't understand the present without understanding the past. But we also can't understand things unless we understand the present we are in. Wow I'm so fucking zen. LOL
After that, I went to do teacher observations. It was here that I realized how fucked up my school situation is. There is this stuff called "History alive" by the teachers' curriculum institute. It's all the stuff to help me teach the standards. Help me teach history. Overheads, games, writeups, etc. My friend John had mentioned it, but I didn't really get it until I went to do the observations. This history alive shit provides me with everything that I need to teach history. Fancy fucking that. Now I'm not saying that I'll just take this shit and not ever teach again. But I won't have to be reinventing the wheel constantly. I can have a structure and work around it. Right now, some of my biggest problems are the kids aren't reading the text or turning in homework. How the fuck am I supposed to get information across to the students? When I lecture I get feedback from the kids that they don't want so much lecture. Ok I hear that. But how am I going to get information across to them. I can have interactive games etc etc whatever. But I need to have information to go along with it. It's fucking driving me crazy. I'm trying to come up with shit to teach for 3 different classes. 2 of the classes this last quarter I never taught before. I was having trouble knowing all the info for students. I know my history but I don't know everything. I know. It's true. I said it. I don't know everything.
I would love to radically change my history class and teach history from the present backwards. I wonder if they would allow me to do that. I have to hit these things called standards... but come on. As interesting as the Phoenicians are, I could go my whole life and never know about them and nothing would radically change. It would be so much easier to hook kids into history if I could hook them into something contemporary to their lives. Hey want to know why the US is in Iraq? Want to know why India and Pakistan could drop nukes on each other over Jammu and Kashmir? Want to know why Hugo Chavez is calling Bush an asshole? Then I could break up the world into continents and focus on that. Teach world history that way. Fuck it I'm going to try it. I'm gonna call up Jeff and get his ok on it and try it that ways. I've always wanted to do it that way. We can't understand the present without understanding the past. But we also can't understand things unless we understand the present we are in. Wow I'm so fucking zen. LOL
Saturday, November 19, 2005
Day 97-100: The Praxis of Pedagogy
Wow, I had no idea that today was the 100th day since blogging. Sweet!!! Anyways, Tuesday and Thursday was just presentations. Not enough students turned in papers or did presentations. Lots just didn't do anything. This isn't good and I'm going to have to reassess how I did this cause this happened last time and I have to do things differently. I'm going to have to do a whole lot more guided practice to get the students to the point where they can do the work well. There is definitely a part of the situation where they weren't doing the work but there was also a part where I wasn't helping them out enough to get the work done. I've decided to take every Friday next quarter and devote it to how to research and write research papers. My tentative new warm up order is SSR w/ typing tutor on Monday, Journal Write on Tuesday, Read along on Thursday; and Community building activities, research tips, and students do a current event.
On Wednesday, we finished up Ghost Dog and I found out some crazy news about one of my CTM. We were watching Ghost Dog and at the end of the movie Ghost Dog gets shot. My CTM stepped out of the room and couldn't watch it. I went to see what was going on and he told me that his brother just got gunned down by robbers. So he had to leave the room to deal cause he couldn't handle watching the movie. This is the CTM that has been causing me lots of trouble and who I totally decided to just not even stress over. But when I heard this... well I'm not a heartless bastard. I talked to his mom and offered my condolences to her, but shit. That is some rough fucked up shit. His dad is gone and so is his brother. Real rough to have all that shit going on.
Today, I watched the Ali G show with students and we hung out. It was supposed to be the Native American heritage assembly but we had so many cancellations that we just decided to postpone it. I also played some chess with students. Also found out that the school got jacked for a bunch of laptops and a DVD player. Mother fuckers!!! And we're thinking that it was an inside job cause people got into classrooms that were locked with no sign of breakin. Fucked up mother fucking sacks of shit! So probably some disgruntled worker in the district that has a master key decided to rob my poor ass school. Crabs in a mother fucking barrel. Go fucking rob Piedmont or something. But that won't happen cause the cops will do something if rich people get robbed. Shit... I ain't even been at this a complete year and the school has been broken into twice. Refuckingdiculous.
Anyways, now I'm on 1 week break before the start of the new quarter. I'm gonna be teaching world cultures again but instead of Asian American history I got multicultural literature. Totally out of my area of expertise, but I'll have to do something. I don't read a lot of fiction and if it is fiction it's sci-fi.
On Wednesday, we finished up Ghost Dog and I found out some crazy news about one of my CTM. We were watching Ghost Dog and at the end of the movie Ghost Dog gets shot. My CTM stepped out of the room and couldn't watch it. I went to see what was going on and he told me that his brother just got gunned down by robbers. So he had to leave the room to deal cause he couldn't handle watching the movie. This is the CTM that has been causing me lots of trouble and who I totally decided to just not even stress over. But when I heard this... well I'm not a heartless bastard. I talked to his mom and offered my condolences to her, but shit. That is some rough fucked up shit. His dad is gone and so is his brother. Real rough to have all that shit going on.
Today, I watched the Ali G show with students and we hung out. It was supposed to be the Native American heritage assembly but we had so many cancellations that we just decided to postpone it. I also played some chess with students. Also found out that the school got jacked for a bunch of laptops and a DVD player. Mother fuckers!!! And we're thinking that it was an inside job cause people got into classrooms that were locked with no sign of breakin. Fucked up mother fucking sacks of shit! So probably some disgruntled worker in the district that has a master key decided to rob my poor ass school. Crabs in a mother fucking barrel. Go fucking rob Piedmont or something. But that won't happen cause the cops will do something if rich people get robbed. Shit... I ain't even been at this a complete year and the school has been broken into twice. Refuckingdiculous.
Anyways, now I'm on 1 week break before the start of the new quarter. I'm gonna be teaching world cultures again but instead of Asian American history I got multicultural literature. Totally out of my area of expertise, but I'll have to do something. I don't read a lot of fiction and if it is fiction it's sci-fi.
Monday, November 14, 2005
Day 96: The Praxis of Pedagogy
Today was time for people to turn in their final papers and do their presentations. Unfortunately, most people didn't turn in their papers in my first and second period classes. Not surprisingly, there were also a bunch of students absent on the day of their presentation. Funny how that is. How unfortunate that they find themselves sick on that day. It's almost like they are... cutting. In my 1st period classes, one of my CTM didn't have his shit together at all. He was making up excuse after excuse after excuse. Saying shit like he couldn't download OpenOffice and the CD that I gave him didn't work. But I spoke to him and reminded him of the fact that he has been assigned hours afterschool and that he has had plenty of time to work on it afterschool. This kid has been rude to me and so I've essentially washed my hands of him. I mean I'm still talking to him and stuff but I'm not breaking my back and going out of my way to make sure he's done his work. So now our interactions are great. He's far more respectful to me now that I don't give a shit. And now that I don't give a shit, I find that dealing with him is far easier on my blood pressure.
My 2nd period didn't have their shit together at all. Nobody presented. So instead we talked about Native American Heritage Month and I showed them "Incident at Oglala" about Leonard Peltier. I also had 2 papers turned in. This has been my worst class all trimester by far.
3rd period was much better. I got more papers and I had students do presentations. Presentations were better and this is by far my favorite class.
Afterschool I had students making up hours and I took one of my CTM around to see where she is in her classes. I know she's not passing my class right now and she is also messing up in Bio. She will however pass her Algebra class. She should be a sophomore but she has 3 credits to her name. And those aren't credits in core classes. I have to remember that if she passes 1 class that is a huge improvement for her. That would be her first high school core class that she got credit for. While she has a WAAAAYYYS to go, that is an improvement and she has to start somewhere. Just expecting her to all of the sudden pass all her classes and be on track is unrealistic of me. She has a fucking crazy life. Mom's addicted to drugs and she lives with her grandma. She's come out of the closet and is dealing with that. Her skills... Anyways, I told her at the beginning of the quarter that I don't care if she dates girls. But if the girls get in the way of her doing her work, then she needs to stop fucking around with the girls. I also spoke to her girlfriend and told the girlfriend that she needs support. Here I am giving advice in a lesbian relationship. It's funny, but really no different from a hetero one. You still got to support and care for the other. While I'm sure there are specific things that come up that pertain only to lesbian relationships, I'm not dealing with that shit. Girl still needs to get her work done.
My 2nd period didn't have their shit together at all. Nobody presented. So instead we talked about Native American Heritage Month and I showed them "Incident at Oglala" about Leonard Peltier. I also had 2 papers turned in. This has been my worst class all trimester by far.
3rd period was much better. I got more papers and I had students do presentations. Presentations were better and this is by far my favorite class.
Afterschool I had students making up hours and I took one of my CTM around to see where she is in her classes. I know she's not passing my class right now and she is also messing up in Bio. She will however pass her Algebra class. She should be a sophomore but she has 3 credits to her name. And those aren't credits in core classes. I have to remember that if she passes 1 class that is a huge improvement for her. That would be her first high school core class that she got credit for. While she has a WAAAAYYYS to go, that is an improvement and she has to start somewhere. Just expecting her to all of the sudden pass all her classes and be on track is unrealistic of me. She has a fucking crazy life. Mom's addicted to drugs and she lives with her grandma. She's come out of the closet and is dealing with that. Her skills... Anyways, I told her at the beginning of the quarter that I don't care if she dates girls. But if the girls get in the way of her doing her work, then she needs to stop fucking around with the girls. I also spoke to her girlfriend and told the girlfriend that she needs support. Here I am giving advice in a lesbian relationship. It's funny, but really no different from a hetero one. You still got to support and care for the other. While I'm sure there are specific things that come up that pertain only to lesbian relationships, I'm not dealing with that shit. Girl still needs to get her work done.
Friday, November 11, 2005
Day 95: The Praxis of Pedagogy
Yesterday I started off all my classes with a short SSR and then I changed their presentation schedules forward one day. On the last day of the quarter we are going to be celebrating native American heritage day with a presentation and stuff so no regular school on that day. After the SSR, I had them work on their projects.
I'm going to have to do a better job of presentations and papers next quarter. I really need to take days and lay out the steps needed for researching. The kids really don't know how and I didn't make that a priority like I said that I would. But it was hard cause I was teaching 2 new classes this year and having a CTM and starting my first full new year. Next quarter will be somewhat better cause I'm having two classes the same while only teaching one new one.
While students were working on their projects I took time out to talk with specific students and see where they are. I've been realizing that I've been taking my frustration and tiredness out on students. The more relaxed and mellow that I am, the better our interactions will be. I can be too hard on students sometimes. And a lot of the kids that I'm working with don't need to be yelled at anymore or have someone get on them. What they need is for someone to listen to them, talk to them, and take an interest in them. It's hard for me though, cause I want the students to do well and so I get on them to do stuff. But often that's not the best tactic to approach them. What matters the most is making a connection and being able to talk to someone in a real and caring way.
There are a lot of hurt kids I'm dealing with. The amount of casual violence in their everyday life eats away at their natural compassion. They all want to be good, but many truly don't know how. They lack consistent role models and their lives are hard. Then on top of this, the public education system in the US is a joke. The classroom in the basement of the school has been flooded recently cause of rain. We don't have a janitor. Windows are broken. Heaters are exposed. It's fucking criminal that the kids and the staff have to work in conditions like that. Public education is not equitable nor is it well funded. This country is still incredibly racist and classist. I guess it's better to spend $1 billion a day killing Iraqis and rebuilding that country as opposed to working on our own.
I'm going to have to do a better job of presentations and papers next quarter. I really need to take days and lay out the steps needed for researching. The kids really don't know how and I didn't make that a priority like I said that I would. But it was hard cause I was teaching 2 new classes this year and having a CTM and starting my first full new year. Next quarter will be somewhat better cause I'm having two classes the same while only teaching one new one.
While students were working on their projects I took time out to talk with specific students and see where they are. I've been realizing that I've been taking my frustration and tiredness out on students. The more relaxed and mellow that I am, the better our interactions will be. I can be too hard on students sometimes. And a lot of the kids that I'm working with don't need to be yelled at anymore or have someone get on them. What they need is for someone to listen to them, talk to them, and take an interest in them. It's hard for me though, cause I want the students to do well and so I get on them to do stuff. But often that's not the best tactic to approach them. What matters the most is making a connection and being able to talk to someone in a real and caring way.
There are a lot of hurt kids I'm dealing with. The amount of casual violence in their everyday life eats away at their natural compassion. They all want to be good, but many truly don't know how. They lack consistent role models and their lives are hard. Then on top of this, the public education system in the US is a joke. The classroom in the basement of the school has been flooded recently cause of rain. We don't have a janitor. Windows are broken. Heaters are exposed. It's fucking criminal that the kids and the staff have to work in conditions like that. Public education is not equitable nor is it well funded. This country is still incredibly racist and classist. I guess it's better to spend $1 billion a day killing Iraqis and rebuilding that country as opposed to working on our own.
Wednesday, November 09, 2005
Day 94: The Praxis of Pedagogy
So we finished up "The Killing Fields" and I talked with the students a bit about the history behind it. I used an overhead and showed them where Cambodia was on a map and I talked a bit about the genocide. Some estimates are up to 3 million people died in a population of 7 million. Ridiculous. Then I had them count off to 7 and then I said that everyone that was a 1, 2, or 3 would be dead from the genocide. My one Cambodian student also volunteered information about it and said that there were Khmer Rouge in San Jose. Trip out! I didn't know that. But I guess why wouldn't they be. So to change things up after that, I talked the next movie Ghost Dog. I talked about Bushido and the way of the warrior. I explained to them a bit about samurai culture and how crazy those motherfuckers were. Committing seppuku isn't some it's-over-quick affair. You gotta disembowel yourself. I also mentioned that the Rza did the music for the movie. That helped to bring them in. But it's a great movie so they were into it.
I kicked a student in the face in Capoeira class today. The kid was talking shit to me and being generally disrespectful. When I said that I was going to play him capoeira he said that he was going to shine his shoes on me. Now this kid has been talking shit to me for a while. He's pissed his CTM off and his CTM is one of the nicest guys around. So I kicked him in the face. Not hard. Just a tap enough to wake him up. After that I knew he was going to come after me so I just waited for my time. Then when he went to kick me I just swept him off his feet. Then yelled at him to stop laying around and get up and play. I enjoyed doing it to him. That's part of the reason that I wanted to stop doing capoeira. It doesn't bring out the best side of me. But hell I'm teaching a martial art to people that don't want to learn it. I've loved capoeira and don't want to teach it to people that have really shitty attitudes about it. I've never wanted to teach capoeira, even to people that wanted to learn. My mestre told me one time that he would stop asking me to teach cause every time he did I quit. Capoeira has always been something that I just enjoyed doing. Something that I did cause I loved doing it. I just wanted to play not teach. Teaching it wasn't fun. Anyways, so then I have to come up with a class for Wednesday next quarter. Film Analysis has turned to Appreciation and I'm doing that class again. So now I got to come up with another class to teach.
I kicked a student in the face in Capoeira class today. The kid was talking shit to me and being generally disrespectful. When I said that I was going to play him capoeira he said that he was going to shine his shoes on me. Now this kid has been talking shit to me for a while. He's pissed his CTM off and his CTM is one of the nicest guys around. So I kicked him in the face. Not hard. Just a tap enough to wake him up. After that I knew he was going to come after me so I just waited for my time. Then when he went to kick me I just swept him off his feet. Then yelled at him to stop laying around and get up and play. I enjoyed doing it to him. That's part of the reason that I wanted to stop doing capoeira. It doesn't bring out the best side of me. But hell I'm teaching a martial art to people that don't want to learn it. I've loved capoeira and don't want to teach it to people that have really shitty attitudes about it. I've never wanted to teach capoeira, even to people that wanted to learn. My mestre told me one time that he would stop asking me to teach cause every time he did I quit. Capoeira has always been something that I just enjoyed doing. Something that I did cause I loved doing it. I just wanted to play not teach. Teaching it wasn't fun. Anyways, so then I have to come up with a class for Wednesday next quarter. Film Analysis has turned to Appreciation and I'm doing that class again. So now I got to come up with another class to teach.
Tuesday, November 08, 2005
Day 92 & 93: The Praxis of Pedagogy
In my 1st period on Monday I had a shortened SSR so that we could do a study test. I handed out the study guide and gave them time to answer questions. Then we played the Rock, Paper, Scissors game to two teams. I'm going to have to come up with better games and better ways of drilling info into students' heads. I got ideas... but fuck they are a pain to implement. I think that's one of the hardest things about teaching. Implementing things. There is always so much more to be doing. New and better things that I can try. They just take planning and practice. And there isn't enough time in the day. Coming up with shit for 3 classes is hard. I mean I could just come up with shit to have them do. Busy work shit. But I don't want to be a party to that. That's not why I got into teaching. But I realize that I got a long way to go and I'm not tripping too hard that I suck right now. I'm a rookie. Rookies always get growing pains. Eli Manning stunk it up last year in front of the entire US. This year he's balling. I don't think my learning curve is like that, but I can only get better.
In second period, we talked about revolution and change through violence. This in contrast to revolution through non-violence a la Gandhi and MLK. I know that white people liked MLK a whole lot better when the other side was a Malcolm X. Nothing makes things happen faster than violence. As much as I don't like GWB, there has been a ton of action and change in the Middle East as a result of him invading Afghanistan and Iraq. Syria out of Lebanon. Ghaddafi giving up his WMD ambitions. So we read about Emiliano Zapata and I talked about anarchism with them. I tried to talk about real anarchy and not the "Anarchy=chaos" propaganda. Zapata was influenced by anarchism and since he's Mexican I thuoght more students would relate. But anarchist anti-hierarchical, anti-vanguard elitist, and anti-oppressive thinking is intriguing to me.
In 3rd period, I handed out a reading about why Oriental is a bad word. We read it and I talked with them about what the reading meant. I took Cornell Notes at the same time. They were into this cause they teenagers always want to hear about the taboo stuff. The racist stuff.
In first period today we had the test. After the test, we talked about France and the riots going on there. I showed them a timeline from the BBC and we read it. The riots were actually somewhat timely considering my class. We were talking about the French Revolution and Islam. Students had an understanding (in widely varying degrees) of both subjects. I have an opinion about this that isn't so popular with some people. I think the riots are French karma for their history of imperialism. The muslims in France that are rioting are mostly from countries that France colonized. France has enriched their country through the plundering of other countries. This is a natural and karmic consequence of their actions. The US has racial problems cause the US had slaves, committed genocide on natives, stole land, etc etc. People shouldn't be shocked or surprised.
In second period we finished up talking about Anarchism and then I had them write about their personal philosophy. Bad choice on my part. They don't have a personal philosophy, but what a good time to start thinking about one. Then I read about the French riots with them. I need to do more current events shit. I should make Thursday a current events day. So maybe next quarter, Monday: SSR with typing tutor, Tuesday: Journal Write, Thursday: current events day, Friday: Student led discussions.
In third period we finished up Orientalism, then we read about derogatory Asian names, and finally we read a poem about being Asian American. The poem was written by Joyce Miyamoto but it could have been yesterday. We're coming to the end of school and kids are getting bogged down. I had signup sheets in all of my classes for presentations. But I think I'll have to change things cause we might not have a normal Friday cause of Native American Heritage Month celebration on the last Friday of the quarter.
In second period, we talked about revolution and change through violence. This in contrast to revolution through non-violence a la Gandhi and MLK. I know that white people liked MLK a whole lot better when the other side was a Malcolm X. Nothing makes things happen faster than violence. As much as I don't like GWB, there has been a ton of action and change in the Middle East as a result of him invading Afghanistan and Iraq. Syria out of Lebanon. Ghaddafi giving up his WMD ambitions. So we read about Emiliano Zapata and I talked about anarchism with them. I tried to talk about real anarchy and not the "Anarchy=chaos" propaganda. Zapata was influenced by anarchism and since he's Mexican I thuoght more students would relate. But anarchist anti-hierarchical, anti-vanguard elitist, and anti-oppressive thinking is intriguing to me.
In 3rd period, I handed out a reading about why Oriental is a bad word. We read it and I talked with them about what the reading meant. I took Cornell Notes at the same time. They were into this cause they teenagers always want to hear about the taboo stuff. The racist stuff.
In first period today we had the test. After the test, we talked about France and the riots going on there. I showed them a timeline from the BBC and we read it. The riots were actually somewhat timely considering my class. We were talking about the French Revolution and Islam. Students had an understanding (in widely varying degrees) of both subjects. I have an opinion about this that isn't so popular with some people. I think the riots are French karma for their history of imperialism. The muslims in France that are rioting are mostly from countries that France colonized. France has enriched their country through the plundering of other countries. This is a natural and karmic consequence of their actions. The US has racial problems cause the US had slaves, committed genocide on natives, stole land, etc etc. People shouldn't be shocked or surprised.
In second period we finished up talking about Anarchism and then I had them write about their personal philosophy. Bad choice on my part. They don't have a personal philosophy, but what a good time to start thinking about one. Then I read about the French riots with them. I need to do more current events shit. I should make Thursday a current events day. So maybe next quarter, Monday: SSR with typing tutor, Tuesday: Journal Write, Thursday: current events day, Friday: Student led discussions.
In third period we finished up Orientalism, then we read about derogatory Asian names, and finally we read a poem about being Asian American. The poem was written by Joyce Miyamoto but it could have been yesterday. We're coming to the end of school and kids are getting bogged down. I had signup sheets in all of my classes for presentations. But I think I'll have to change things cause we might not have a normal Friday cause of Native American Heritage Month celebration on the last Friday of the quarter.
Sunday, November 06, 2005
Day 91: The Praxis of Pedagogy
In my first period class, we talked about when we should have a test and it was decided that we would have the test on Tuesday. Students felt that if they had it on Thursday that they wouldn't remember anything from the study day on Tuesday. After that, we talked about the Congress of Vienna and how European countries worked together to contain France. I related this to gang warfare and told students that if they can understand the dynamics of gang interaction then that would give them insight into world history and state interaction. I got a few gang members in my class so this actually draws them in. When I ask questions they intuitively know the answer. After I lectured on this, we finished up "The Corporation."
In my second period class, I gave students a timeline of Gandhi's life and talked a bit about what he did. I explained to them the caste system and Gandhi's reaction to it as well as how he defied the British imperialists and helped to drive them out of India. The man is an interesting guy and his story draws people in, especially when I describe satyagrahis that walk into clubs and beatings. To walk into violence without raising your hand against the other takes serious courage and resolve. I for one don't have that courage and resolve. I would hit the person and fight back physically and violently. I don't like getting hit and I'd rather be hitting back then just letting someone do it to me. Then we read some more of gandhi's words. But about halfway through the class I had to go on a field trip with my 3rd period. More than half of our small school went on this field trip so the principal just made it a minimum day. So classes went straight through till 1:00.
So the field trip was to see a Dia de los Muertos dance performance. We walked to it from school which took us about an hour after we broke up for lunch. It was pretty damn good. Short but good. Interesting to see the various styles of dance from different states in Mexico. Interesting way to respect the dead too. Very different from my Chinese background. Chinese will leave shit out for the dead but have no desire to hang around and meet up with any. I remember being in Taiwan during the hungry ghost festival. That is the day when all the ghosts come out and wander around the streets. Fucking Taipei was empty. There weren't very many cars out at all. Everyone was at home so that they wouldn't meet up with any ghosts in the street. It's a trip to have a city that is so bustling be so dead. It was actually really eerie.
In my second period class, I gave students a timeline of Gandhi's life and talked a bit about what he did. I explained to them the caste system and Gandhi's reaction to it as well as how he defied the British imperialists and helped to drive them out of India. The man is an interesting guy and his story draws people in, especially when I describe satyagrahis that walk into clubs and beatings. To walk into violence without raising your hand against the other takes serious courage and resolve. I for one don't have that courage and resolve. I would hit the person and fight back physically and violently. I don't like getting hit and I'd rather be hitting back then just letting someone do it to me. Then we read some more of gandhi's words. But about halfway through the class I had to go on a field trip with my 3rd period. More than half of our small school went on this field trip so the principal just made it a minimum day. So classes went straight through till 1:00.
So the field trip was to see a Dia de los Muertos dance performance. We walked to it from school which took us about an hour after we broke up for lunch. It was pretty damn good. Short but good. Interesting to see the various styles of dance from different states in Mexico. Interesting way to respect the dead too. Very different from my Chinese background. Chinese will leave shit out for the dead but have no desire to hang around and meet up with any. I remember being in Taiwan during the hungry ghost festival. That is the day when all the ghosts come out and wander around the streets. Fucking Taipei was empty. There weren't very many cars out at all. Everyone was at home so that they wouldn't meet up with any ghosts in the street. It's a trip to have a city that is so bustling be so dead. It was actually really eerie.
Thursday, November 03, 2005
Day 89 & 90: The Praxis of Pedagogy
So on Wednesday, I started off watching "The Killing Fields." Note to self: Never watch such a depressing movie at 8:40 in the morning. It was a heavy movie and the one Cambodian girl in my class was sitting up and paying attention to the movie. Normally she always looks completely bored and has her head down but she was drawn into this movie. I'll finish it next week.
For my Capoeira class, it was really small cause people were testing. So I took those kids and worked em good. Making them do the low Angola ground game stuff. It is starting to get cold and I'm wondering where we are going to do this class when the next trimester starts. I don't know if we'll even do this next semester.
So today I was feeling nauseous all day long. I felt faint and wanted to hurl on obnoxious students. I didn't do urban acting cause I passed out coming up with a lesson plan for my 3rd period observation. No time to plan for the urban acting. So after that I talked about Napoleon, the battle of Trafalgar, guerrilla warfare, and invading Russia. The kids were too young to have seen the Princess Bride. I said the reference that Vizzini says to Wesley, "You've fallen victim to the classic blunder! The first is never get involved in a land war in Asia. The second though slightly less well known is never go up against a Sicilian when death is on the line!" Nothing. Nada. It's a meaningless quote when only you get it. Anyways... we looked at a map that showed the number of people Napoleon started off with and the number they came back with. I recall it being something like 442,000 and coming back with 28,000. Then there was a temperature chart that had the returning temperature something like -35 degrees Fahrenheit. Reeeeediculous. That's some fucked up weather. Then I tried to get the tv dvd working and had major technical difficulties. It wasn't until 3rd period that I figured out that the video input wasn't working anymore.
In second period, I had them list out all the various ways that one could make change. Then we talked about the components that made up the various ways. It was from here that I introduced change through non-violence or violence. In my opinion, each has its place. Hell the idea of a violent revolution is as American as... the Declaration of Independence. But before I got into violent revolution I talked about non-violent revolution and Gandhi. Then we started in on a reading about Satyagraha.
My 3rd period was what I was gearing up for. I was getting observed by a person from my credentialling school. Since we got about 5 days left of instruction...actually 4 since this class is going to the Dia De Los Muertos celebration, I wanted to start in on more history of Asian Americans. I think perhaps the most well known event was the Japanese internment. So I stuck with something that works. I did the lesson that I did last year for my multicultural studies class. It went over pretty well even though I felt nauseous the whole time. After I showed them the Executive Order then we went through and read bits and pieces that I thought were important. After that I went on to show more of "The Corporation." I ended in the last five minutes so I'll have to finish it up.
After class I spoke to her and she was pretty nice to me about the whole thing. Unfortunately, that's not what I was looking for. I was looking for her to give me some constructive criticism to make my teaching better. Today was also the last day to turn in missing work so I had a lot of students in my class at the end of school turning in missing work. I got a stack of papers that has to be at least an inch and a half thick. Did I ever mention I fucking hate grading?
For my Capoeira class, it was really small cause people were testing. So I took those kids and worked em good. Making them do the low Angola ground game stuff. It is starting to get cold and I'm wondering where we are going to do this class when the next trimester starts. I don't know if we'll even do this next semester.
So today I was feeling nauseous all day long. I felt faint and wanted to hurl on obnoxious students. I didn't do urban acting cause I passed out coming up with a lesson plan for my 3rd period observation. No time to plan for the urban acting. So after that I talked about Napoleon, the battle of Trafalgar, guerrilla warfare, and invading Russia. The kids were too young to have seen the Princess Bride. I said the reference that Vizzini says to Wesley, "You've fallen victim to the classic blunder! The first is never get involved in a land war in Asia. The second though slightly less well known is never go up against a Sicilian when death is on the line!" Nothing. Nada. It's a meaningless quote when only you get it. Anyways... we looked at a map that showed the number of people Napoleon started off with and the number they came back with. I recall it being something like 442,000 and coming back with 28,000. Then there was a temperature chart that had the returning temperature something like -35 degrees Fahrenheit. Reeeeediculous. That's some fucked up weather. Then I tried to get the tv dvd working and had major technical difficulties. It wasn't until 3rd period that I figured out that the video input wasn't working anymore.
In second period, I had them list out all the various ways that one could make change. Then we talked about the components that made up the various ways. It was from here that I introduced change through non-violence or violence. In my opinion, each has its place. Hell the idea of a violent revolution is as American as... the Declaration of Independence. But before I got into violent revolution I talked about non-violent revolution and Gandhi. Then we started in on a reading about Satyagraha.
My 3rd period was what I was gearing up for. I was getting observed by a person from my credentialling school. Since we got about 5 days left of instruction...actually 4 since this class is going to the Dia De Los Muertos celebration, I wanted to start in on more history of Asian Americans. I think perhaps the most well known event was the Japanese internment. So I stuck with something that works. I did the lesson that I did last year for my multicultural studies class. It went over pretty well even though I felt nauseous the whole time. After I showed them the Executive Order then we went through and read bits and pieces that I thought were important. After that I went on to show more of "The Corporation." I ended in the last five minutes so I'll have to finish it up.
After class I spoke to her and she was pretty nice to me about the whole thing. Unfortunately, that's not what I was looking for. I was looking for her to give me some constructive criticism to make my teaching better. Today was also the last day to turn in missing work so I had a lot of students in my class at the end of school turning in missing work. I got a stack of papers that has to be at least an inch and a half thick. Did I ever mention I fucking hate grading?
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
Day 88: The Praxis of Pedagogy
Since my friend Jeremy was all demoralized I decided to ask the following journal question to my 1st and 2nd periods: Why don't students seem to care? What can be done to help make students participants in their own education? What can be done in the community? What can teachers do? How much of it is personal responsibility?
After I asked that question, I got into a discussion with both periods about what they wrote down. I summarized their thoughts on an overhead. Interesting stuff that I'll have to blog later about. Unfortunately, I left it at school. But it was an interesting discussion and it is good to hear from people. When they were writing their answer in the journal I walked around and noticed that were really into it. This was reflected in the discussion. I think next trimester I will have student led discussions on Friday. I firmly believe that they should have more control and say in their education and hopefully this will be a way to make that happen. If they are to be the future leaders then they must learn how to lead and be given chances to do so. After that I showed them all an overhead calendar of how much time we had left in the trimester. Not counting today we have 5 days left of instruction before presentations and finals week. Scary. Next I handed back contracts and had everyone write that they had till Thursday to turn in all their missing work and corrected tests. Nothing will be accepted after that.
In my first period, my anticipatory set was, "What is a Napoleon Complex?" One student answered something about power so I gave him a point for being the only one to try. So I explained the Napoleon complex or little man's syndrome or martinet. Whatever you want to call it. Then I tied that mentality in to people they know in life and finally to Napoleon and his coming to power in France. This got into Napoleon's downfall which got into the Peninsular War and guerrilla warfare. So I started to talk about guerilla warfare. Class ended on this.
In my second period, I broke people into groups and then had them write on all the various ways that change could be created with themselves, their school, their communities, their nation, and the world. Class ended on this.
My 3rd period I took my students to the Asian Art Museum. I told them before that if they embarrassed me that I would make it my life mission to make sure they never go on any field trip ever again. They behaved wonderfully. Most had never been to a museum before so just the fact that they were there was great. But I left them to wander around as I did the same.
After I asked that question, I got into a discussion with both periods about what they wrote down. I summarized their thoughts on an overhead. Interesting stuff that I'll have to blog later about. Unfortunately, I left it at school. But it was an interesting discussion and it is good to hear from people. When they were writing their answer in the journal I walked around and noticed that were really into it. This was reflected in the discussion. I think next trimester I will have student led discussions on Friday. I firmly believe that they should have more control and say in their education and hopefully this will be a way to make that happen. If they are to be the future leaders then they must learn how to lead and be given chances to do so. After that I showed them all an overhead calendar of how much time we had left in the trimester. Not counting today we have 5 days left of instruction before presentations and finals week. Scary. Next I handed back contracts and had everyone write that they had till Thursday to turn in all their missing work and corrected tests. Nothing will be accepted after that.
In my first period, my anticipatory set was, "What is a Napoleon Complex?" One student answered something about power so I gave him a point for being the only one to try. So I explained the Napoleon complex or little man's syndrome or martinet. Whatever you want to call it. Then I tied that mentality in to people they know in life and finally to Napoleon and his coming to power in France. This got into Napoleon's downfall which got into the Peninsular War and guerrilla warfare. So I started to talk about guerilla warfare. Class ended on this.
In my second period, I broke people into groups and then had them write on all the various ways that change could be created with themselves, their school, their communities, their nation, and the world. Class ended on this.
My 3rd period I took my students to the Asian Art Museum. I told them before that if they embarrassed me that I would make it my life mission to make sure they never go on any field trip ever again. They behaved wonderfully. Most had never been to a museum before so just the fact that they were there was great. But I left them to wander around as I did the same.
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